It’s been just about four years since I started this blog and began haphazardly updating it (I think I may have averaged between 5 and 10 posts a year as a best estimate). When I started it I definitely had some intention that I can’t seem to remember since every time I returned to the blog each year I had a different intention behind it. More to the point, I think my innate to desire to assign intention and significance to my blogging to mask the vapid rants as something OTHER than vapid rants is probably what lead me to psyching myself out, ODing on my own hubris and abandoning the idea of personal journalism for a year before trying again.
Then I started to think that, rather than trying to implement a goal-based intentionality to every goddamn thing I write, why don’t I take a page out of my own book (the one I use with my students) and give myself more of a process based goal. I then started to think about the name of this blog, thoughtgrenade. I began to think that there was probably a direct corollary between the name and the content I want to be producing. I began to think there was more to the name than simply the type of attack one character used in one comic book that I read when I was fourteen (there ya go, secrets out).
So what is a thoughtgrenade?
It’s slightly more than a vapid rant since it usually stems from some aspect of the world that bothers me quite a bit (okay, so maybe that is a vapid rant, but stay with me here), particularly enough to make me want to actually write about it. While I tend to be a fairly extroverted person in general, I tend to not commit my opinions to written word all that often. Shooting your mouth off in a bar, forum or (from time to time) classroom is one thing, but putting it to text usually means you REALLY mean it, at least enough to leave a paper trail.
By that very nature, its also something that has been percolating in my mind for a while, and as such I want to put a little bit more grace into the presentation than I would any other article. A thoughtgrenade must be crafted, not vomited. I realize this may be inserting just a little too much importance on the process, but I do earnestly believe that if I am putting a piece out there that it should be the best piece it possibly can be.
Finally, a thoughtgrenade cannot be tame. Ever. Sometimes I write to make friends, sometimes the warmest, fuzziest bullshit spews from my mouth like a runny faucet. I am more or less okay committing to not doing that here. If I don’t piss someone off with what I write then I’m not doing my job right. This world is full of complacency, full of good little lambs doing what they are told. This blog is where I actively and respectfully do the opposite. This blog is my objection, my raised fist, my a’capella protest song. If I am not challenging someone with what I write, even if that someone happens to be myself, I have no business ever putting words to this digital parchment ever again.
So there you have it. Commitment, craft, challenging…thoughtgrenade.
Yeah. I like that.